it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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