State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
