I'm gonna have a badass scar
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
We smell like vodka and hangover
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