It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
