is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
