I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
