I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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