After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
