im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize