Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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