I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
