I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
