People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
