I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
we should paint friendship bongs
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