My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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