You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize
