You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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