you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
