So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
