I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
