she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
