The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
