Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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