We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
