i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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