Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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