it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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