I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
