at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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