So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
