So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
