Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
