I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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