can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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