take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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