yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
