i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
