Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
