that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
