i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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