I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize