the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
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