oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
