whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize