it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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