Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
The dick lei will go down in squad history
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
