what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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