she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
