I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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