love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize