IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
