Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
